My Writing Process Blog Tour, also known as People are Fucking Fucks.

Thanks to Greta Burroughs for inviting me to join the “My Writing Process” blog tour. If you’re not already familiar with Greta or her husband Robert, get with it, people! Greta writes the delightful Patchy and Calico series, and Robert delves into pulp action with his novels, beginning with Riders in the Wind, an excellent period piece full of Indiana Jones-type thrills! You can find both authors’ work easily on Amazon.com.

Unfortunately, and as usual, I couldn’t find anyone to follow me on this tour thing. You’d think when you do a lot of people a lot of favors at least one of them would try to help you when you need a bit of assistance with something, no matter how lame it may be. But, apparently that’s not the case.

So rather than just toss what I wrote, I decided to post it on my own, with no affiliation with the tour. I have no idea who the hell started it anyway or under what auspices it was running. But please remember that nothing said here should be construed as being supported or endorsed by Greta or Robert Burroughs. They don’t use the word “motherfucker” nearly as much as I do.

(Honestly, I’ve never heard either one of them swear. They’re just way too nice of folks to be hanging with someone like me.)

My Writing Process

What am I working on?
Probably far too many things at once. I swear I have some sort of attention deficit disorder when it comes to writing. First off, I’ve just re-vamped, re-edited and published a print version of my Science Fiction Trivia Quiz Book, along with a new e-book version of it. And I’m finished with a more generalized quiz book, Five Star Trivia, and I’m trying to get the nuances on that one done.

I’ve got a super-hero novel in the works, as I have for the past two years, going back and forth as ideas strike me. It’ll be the first novel of a trilogy. And it will never be finished. I think that’s pretty obvious.

I’m also working on a couple of science fiction concepts, included a very eschatological one that uses the legendary Shaver Mystery as a major plot point. I’m also got the seeds for a short story collection based on the works of the dinosaur metal band Blue Oyster Cult in my head.

There’s also a compendium of facts about obscure old-time radio shows, and one on old comic book characters in the works.

How does my work differ from others of its genre?
Well, my quiz books are not the easy, multiple choice stuff that reuses the same questions and answers that everyone else does. I try to put a little thought into my questions, to make them both interesting and something you have to think about a bit. I always hope that they might inspire folks to check into some of the myriad topics I write them on.

My fiction tends to be a bit on the bizarro side, and usually quite pulpy and sci-fi laden. It’s not going to win any awards, but I hope it’ll use up a few minutes or hours for someone who reads it and they won’t wish they had those few minutes or hours back afterwards.

Why do I write what I do?
For the babes and the bucks. Seriously, I just do it because 1) it’s fun, 2) it keeps me off the street, and 3) I like showing people there are things out there beyond the pap that is being fed to them. If a question on the Mothers of Invention gets one person listening to Frank Zappa, then I’m a bigger success than Stephen King.

How does my writing process work?
I have no idea. Honestly, most of my really cool ideas come from dreams, at least for my fiction, and evil twists I think of when thinking of normal situations. If it sounds cool, I’ll write it down and hope for the best.

Reading what I wrote last week … boy, that’s kinda lame. I was trying to keep it pretty nice and neat, since Greta and Bob are nice folks and I’d hate to embarrass them. But since I’m writing this for me now and no one else, fuck it.

If you’ve got the time to worry about some “process” for your writing, you’ve got singularly weird priorities. Just fucking write, for fuck’s sake. I get distracted so easy by everything and its brother that I couldn’t follow any asshat process if I tried. It’s just one more level of pomposity and snobbishness that a lot of “writers” like to layer on themselves so the angle they look down their noses upon other non-authors is a lot more acute.

Here’s the goddamn process:

  1. Sit down.
  2. Think of an idea.
  3. Write.
  4. When you come to a point where you can’t think of something else, take a break.
  5. Repeat as necessary.

Is that so hard?

 

Who’s up next?

No one. It ends here like Walking Dead should have with first season. As I said before, nobody could find the time to help me with this, and I end up looking like an ass. I had the Burroughses’ drop me from their list, since couldn’t properly reciprocate and fulfill my end of the bargain.

Oh, and by the way, if you are an indie author, never EVER ask me again:

  • To join a blog hop or blog tour or whatever the fuck you want to call it.
  • If you want my opinion about whatever sort of suspected fraudulent endeavor you’ve happened upon, either read my blog or IU and hope it’s there or just click away! In fact, that’s probably the best thing you can do! It is survival of the fucking fittest in the indie world, people. And if you can’t hack it, it’s probably best if you get sheared down by the Reaper early. Please feel free to send your book to PublishAmerica and AuthorSolutions. I hear they’re just the ginchiest and do wonders for beginning authors!
  • For any help for any project you may be doing unless you are either paying or you are a VERY good friend. Already had to deal with one certifiable weasel on that account. Ho-ho-ho!

And here’s the promotional bullshit you expect with this kinda crap. Sorry. I know it’s pointless and no one ever clicks on this junk, but I’d already written this all out, and I don’t think I’ve actually promoted anything I’ve done since starting this new blog:

About Me:

Rich Meyer has written more than thirty e-books, several print books (so far), a couple of short stories, a lot of flash fiction, and is preparing a lot of things that he hopes he won’t procrastinate too long about.

Rich is a regular contributor to the self-publishing blog Indies Unlimited, as well as his own blog of reviews and strangeness. He is a volunteer for the Old Time Radio Researchers Group, and the single proudest moment of his life was getting his artwork published as part of the limited edition Charlton Arrow Trading Cards series.

Rich also runs Quantum Formatting Service, which provides independent and self-published authors with an affordable alternative for print and e-book formatting.

Rich lives with his wife Mona and a plethora of furry children in Schuylkill County, Pennsylvania, which is to the real world what Tatooine was to Luke Skywalker.

LINKS

This Blog: https://ballsdeepandcryinglikeababy.wordpress.com

Twitter: @RichMeyer1964

Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/rich.meyer

Quantum Formatting Service: http://quantumformatting.weebly.com ($40 formatting for e-books or print books)

Amazon US page: http://www.amazon.com/Rich-Meyer/e/B004HV1GTM

Amazon UK page: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Rich-Meyer/e/B004HV1GTM

Review: The 6 Steps Plan to e-Publishing (Kindle ebooks): How to Write, Publish in kindle format and Market your Kindle Books with Amazon KDP

The 6 Steps Plan to e-Publishing (Kindle ebooks): How to Write, Publish in kindle format and Market your Kindle Books with Amazon KDP
The 6 Steps Plan to e-Publishing (Kindle ebooks): How to Write, Publish in kindle format and Market your Kindle Books with Amazon KDP by Ally Nathaniel
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

I received a copy of this book from StoryCartel.com in exchange for an honest review. Unfortunately, I wish I hadn’t bothered with it, for the entire ten minutes it took to read. It’s simply reiterative of information found freely on the internet and in at least a dozen other similar e-books people have published in an attempt to ride the coattails of the e-publishing revolution instead of creating actual original content.

To start with, “The 6 Steps Plan to…” for a title doesn’t even sound right. It’s a six-step scheme, not a system.

Even barring that, a guide to e-publishing needs to include information on formatting your book for a e-publishing platform, and this one really doesn’t. It’s understandable, as the book is horribly formatted and hard to read. (Hint: Paragraph indents help your reader move along, even in non-fiction).

While this could’ve been an interesting look at the game from the viewpoint of a children’s book author, it really doesn’t even do that well. The illustrator’s role – the most important part of a children’s book – is relatively glossed over. Fiverr.com is also stressed overmuch as an option for such things as artwork and covers. Try to remember that if you can’t do it yourself, you get what you pay for. A $5 cover will look like a $5 cover, no matter how much that Fiverr person knows how to use that pirated version of Photoshop.

There are far too many good books on how to publish on Kindles and other e-readers, and a wealth of information for free on the internet, to bother picking up a book like this.

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Review: Night Of The Big Heat

Night Of The Big Heat Night Of The Big Heat by John Lymington My rating: 4 of 5 stars I’ve been wanting to read this book for about twenty-five years now, since the first time I saw Island of the Burning Doomed on the Sci-Fi Channel and it became one of my favorite British science fiction flicks. Unfortunately, this paperback was either unavailable or outrageously priced, until a week ago when I noticed one for 99-cents on Amazon. John Lymington’s story is very similar to the movie, and in many ways more logical (at least at the climax). His main characters aren’t the usual cardboard cut-outs you often get in genre adventures. Patricia and the Callums are well written and have personality. The movie had taken some definite liberties with the menaces, and they’re much more frightening in the book, as their nature and even size is much different and again more logical. Their appearance on the island in the middle of the heat wave (in the summer, and not the winter as in the movie – another bit of illogic that the movie had) create a very confined feeling … you can almost feel the stifling heat yourself. I’d have to say this book was worth the wait to read. View all my reviews

Review: Showcase Presents: Doc Savage

Showcase Presents: Doc Savage
Showcase Presents: Doc Savage by Steve Englehart
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Easily the best Doc Savage comic book compilation out there. This book reprints the black-and-white magazine that Marvel Comics published to capitalize on the George Pal movie.

These tales are all new adventures that feature Doc and his crew in some very well-written and pulpily believable stories. This is the closest the comics have gotten to recreating the fun and adventure of the Doc Savage pulp magazines. Highly recommended!

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Review: The Flintstones

The Flintstones
The Flintstones by Ray Dirgo
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was a very interesting look at the stone age family. If only the creationists could read this … they would change their minds in a heartbeat! It’s evolution in action!

I was surprised to see how historically accurate this document was, and amazed that the great Ray Dirgo could capture the nuances of caveman life. I had thought Korg 70,000 BC was more documentarian, but obviously I was wrong.

Over the course of this book, we see the characters evolve. Fred Flintstone’s life is spent working, eating, and bowling. We see the strife he goes through at work, in the eternal battle with his boss. We see the strife in his home life, as he always must contend with his wife Wilma wanting to go out to eat instead of cooking herself. And we see Fred’s only passion: Bowling.

I was fascinated to discover how much of prehistoric existence revolved around bowling … ten pins … or skittleball. I suppose we’ll never really know what they actually called it back then, but it looks like our “bowling.” And we see the game evolve; as the book begins, the game is played with round discs (as shown when Fred’s young daughter tosses one into his cranium), but as this chronicle closes, the game is being played with massive black rocks. At least, I think they are rocks – it could be something else that the ancient astronauts have given Fred and his people to help them up the evolutionary ladder.

All in all, a delightful and thought-provoking treatise on the world of Mankind’s distant past. I can only hope we too, as a society, can someday reach this level of sophistication before the next great catastrophe destroys our world, much as it did to Fred Flintstone’s land of rock and scrumptosaurus steaks.

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Review: Terror Wears No Shoes

Terror Wears No Shoes
Terror Wears No Shoes by Kenneth Robeson
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Excellent post-war Doc Savage adventure. The reader is no longer constantly reminded of what a fantastic specimen Doc is, and there’s a lot more intrigue and action. Monk and Ham are along for the ride, and I believe Long Tom makes his final appearance in the original adventures in this story. Fun tale and definitely a must-read for Doc Savage fans!

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Review: Rogue Moon

Rogue Moon
Rogue Moon by Algis Budrys
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

An amazingly good novel, this one of the few that really makes you forget about the science fiction trappings as you delve through all the layers of characterization. This is one of those books where the main characters are truly obnoxious, unlikable, and thoroughly enthralling.

Highly recommended! I cannot believe I had never happened across this classic novel before this, but I am certainly glad I did!

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